We'll call him Carlos, I've known Carlos for many years. The other day in Biarro Pedrigal he came to me asking for some money; it seemed his mother had just died and he needed money to buy her some flowers. I said no! Carlos' mother had for several years stayed in an old folks home not more than two miles away. She died there. Not once did Carlos visit his old mother living a short distance away. Not once did he give her a flower or a kiss, but now that she is dead, he was tearfully begging for money to buy her some flowers. Too late Carlos! She's gone. Your love and flowers are simply ... too late.
Why is it when our friend or loved one dies, then we pile on the flowers, tributes and elegant eulogies. Beautiful music, expensive casket! Why?
The honoree is no longer at the service! He left the building! Really.
I don't think it's so much pragmatism as just simple common sense. FACT! I'll appreciate the flowers and tributes only while I'm alive. When I'm gone what's the point?? Why pile on a ton of expensive flowers and a sauce of platitudes piled over a lovely casket ... that contains the one who was, but is no more?
A simple gravestone ... a simple statement, should be sufficient. Prince or pauper death is the final equalizer of the rich or poor.
When I die, no flowers please, or hearse carrying an expensive casket ... put that money where it's really needed by the living poor. While the show of respect may impress the living ... the very object of that show of love and respect ... "has left the building!"
Giving your friends and loved ones their flowers now makes so much more sense than an expensive salute to their memory after they're gone.
