MY FLOWERS NOW?

Many of you who have read my blogs and understand the nature of my ministry, realize my small four-wheel drive SUV is essential to the ministry. We go to the needy (they don't come to us.) We work where the needs are. We are, (as in most ministries,) dependent on wheels.

The other day I took my Nissan Xterra (SUV) in to be serviced. Fast. Simple. Inexpensive! Things were fine UNTIL they lifted up the car up and looked underneath at the rear frame, I learned a lot. The mechanic said..."This car was in an accident before you bought it ... and it isn't safe to drive!!!" I went down to look at; he was right ... The 120.000 miles it has are hard miles. Oh boy more expenses ... and now a rental car!!!

I sought counsel from several of my supporters, and with one accord. "Von, change vehicles. Get an SUV that's younger and has less miles." They said that they would like to see me in a more dependable car. Well, I can't argue about that ... although, I'm content to continue with the old one and see who out-lives-who.

Having friends check out SUVs ... it looks as if a Subaru Forrester would do the job. Consumer Reports rate it as the best value.

Now to pay for it I'll need faith and friends; plenty of both. We've scraped together half the cost. (PTL!!!) This will be my last car ... if any of you would like to beat me to my funeral ... I could actually use your flowers now!

Send me an e-mail and I'll tell you how. My e-mail address is egvont@aol.com

Thanks!!!

GIVE ME MY FLOWERS NOW!

We'll call him Carlos, I've known Carlos for many years. The other day in Biarro Pedrigal he came to me asking for some money; it seemed his mother had just died and he needed money to buy her some flowers. I said no!  Carlos' mother had for several years stayed in an old folks home not more than two miles away. She died there. Not once did Carlos visit his old mother living a short distance away. Not once did he give her a flower or a kiss, but now that she is dead, he was tearfully begging for money to buy her some flowers. Too late Carlos! She's gone. Your love and flowers are simply  ... too late.

Why is it when our friend or loved one dies, then we pile on the flowers, tributes and elegant eulogies. Beautiful music, expensive casket! Why?

The honoree is no longer at the service!  He left the building! Really.

I don't think it's so much pragmatism as just simple common sense. FACT! I'll appreciate the flowers and tributes only while I'm alive. When I'm gone what's the point??  Why pile on a ton of expensive flowers and a sauce of platitudes piled over a lovely casket ... that contains the one who was, but is no more?

A simple gravestone ... a simple statement, should be sufficient.  Prince or pauper death is the final equalizer of the rich or poor.

When I die, no flowers please, or hearse carrying an expensive casket ... put that money where it's really needed by the living poor. While the show of respect may impress the living ... the very object of that show of love and respect ... "has left the building!"

Giving your friends and loved ones their flowers now makes so much more sense than an expensive salute to their memory after they're gone.

YESTERDAY

Our Barrio Ministry Days are anything but routine, similar maybe, but never routine. There is always laughter and happy-highs but on occasion there is a place for anger and sorrow. I was providing showers for about thirty boys and I noticed a new boy. He was about twelve years old. I noticed something I didn't like; in fact it angered me. Two reddish and swollen lumps on his lower abdomen. His testicles had not descended and now they were swollen and hurting bad. I called for his mother and she came. I asked her if she had ever seen a doctor on this, and she said she had some years back and the doctor said it was okay and in time they would drop! Foolish and ignorant doctors anger me! This boy was hurting and now the special surgery to drop these into his scrotum is going to cost big dollars! Please pray that we can find a good pediatric surgeon in Tijuana. His mother, a widow with three kids, and cleans houses for a living can't afford the cost of a procedure this sophisticated ... and we can't simply say, God bless you and we'll pray for you. We have to do something, and fast.

A photo would tell the story but would not be appropriate.

We stopped in to Sandra's small house. She had asked for a big stroller so she could push her crippled boy around. We visited her and her boy ... Andres. Andres is twenty-four and has the body of a five-year old. I sat on the bed watching him. He was deformed physically and mentally by meningitis when he was a baby. Again, a picture just wouldn't be appropriate. She mentioned he needs a little heater too, as it gets so cold at nights. His father works at the dump and comes home with a little money every weekend. Sandra? Well, she sells old clothes; she lays the cloths on the side of the street in front of her house hoping someone will buy.

We see so many legitimate needs, and SINCERELY, thanks to you, we don't just pass-by.

On the surgery, we'll somehow pray the money in.

WILLY THE CLAM

Willy was no different than the thousands of other clams along

The Mission Bay shoreline. He was a middle age clam living a rather tranquil life. The only stress he came across in his quiet life, was low tide ... now somehow clams in Mission Bay area know that at low tide danger hovers over the shore line looking for clams and of course Willy was in the line up along with his friends. The fluttering shadows of Seagulls above him made him nervous ... and there is nothing like a nervous clam.

Well, yesterday it became Willy's turn! A sharp eyed Seagull spotted him, and zoomed down catching Willy in his claws. Willy the clam never had an experience like this. Very rare for clams to fly! Up, up, up he went ... and then the Seagull suddenly let go. And now Willy was on his own hurdling down, picking up speed, faster and faster; faster then he had ever gone before. The Seagull following.

Thrilling ride indeed, but it didn't last long. Willy's courage was commendable: didn't scream, (clams rarely do.) He simply tightened his shell for the inevitable ... and he hit the concrete hard. Splat! His small life broke in pieces.

The big seagull stood there eating the best of Willy. Early morning clam cocktail, leaving the shell of what was Willy on the concrete to dry out and be swept away.

Up, Up and away the Seagull flew over to the shoreline again, You guessed it; looking for another Willy.

It's True: Mission Bay, in San Diego, has some intelligent Seagulls. At low tide they find their clam, fly about 70 feet up and over the cement walk-way, then drop the clam. When it hits the concrete it breaks apart and presto! Breakfast!

THREE AND AN SUV

Changing to small. Von's Ministries may be small, but in our case small is more effective and efficient. Today in my small organization of "three and an SUV" (Note the poetry!), as opposed to my former organization of seventeen paid workers, makes a big dollar difference in both staff, vehicles and other overhead expenses. In our case the difference in being small means those extra dollars go to expanding our reach directly into the homes of the poor and needy. That figures.

Each request our Barrio people make for help, no matter how small an amount, has to be checked out. As the border economy worsens; lying, cheating and scams grow more common. We have to choose what needs are to be met, and that means wisdom.

Each week the three of us work in one of four barrios. Yesterday was barrio Pedrigal: Seventy children and forty adults showed up. The three of us work hard. Rosa and Lino and their two handicapped babys, they are so thankful for their nebulizer. A new lady has a medical need; her little daughter has hepatitis and needs lab work done. By the way, have you ever seen an American kid jump up and down with joy, because he won a dollar? Kids play games, win a dollar, and head to the local store to buy some junk food ... they're hungry! At this time Abraham is undergoing surgery in Mexico city. A lot going on.

Looks like it's going to be raining this weekend in Barrio Ijido and because of the thick mud, Ijido shuts down, but over a dozen families are in need of basic food and drinking water, so I'm sending Lucas with basic food to help them through the five or six days of rain and mud.

With ministry there is always something going on. Thanks for your prayers and part with us.

SO CLOSE YET SO FAR AWAY

Moving up from South Mexico doesn't mean conditions will be better. Rosa, her husband Lino and two small daughters moved up from the south and are living with some distant relatives in one of our barrios. Lino's in bed after heart surgery and their two baby girls were born severely handicapped, one is still in the hospital with water in her lungs.

The neighbors mentioned seeing a lone woman wandering the neighborhood late in the night asking for some money for milk. Rosa?

Rosa, heard about us from a neighbor; she approached Hortensia and said; "I heard you help people in need." Rosa, wasn't asking for much, just transportation money to go to the hospital and see her daughter, she also needed money for some tortillas.

Where this will lead? We don't know, how deep in our pockets it will go? We don't know. We just know this is a legitimate need and that's what we are there for. In this case, just a few dollars.

In a few days we will be sending 14 year old Abram and his mother down to Mexico City for the third and hopefully last time. They are going to fit him with a catheter and even though he will

be fitted with a small plastic sack on his leg, he won't be using pampers any more. A trip like this will be well over a thousand dollars ... way more than this poor family can possibly pay.

We want to thank you for your prayers for our safety and wisdom. And a big thanks for those of you who pitch in and provide the dollars to meet these needs. People so close, yet so far away.

THE TRUTH ABOUT MY SUV

Well, a few days ago, I took my faithful little eleven year old, SUV in to get it's 120,000 plus check up. Normally just a day's worth of work, a lot of cash, and on the road again.

My first surprise was that it was in a major accident before I bought it! From then on the news got worse.  Front and rear suspension was really messed up by now ... rear suspension is broken. My mechanics comforting words; "Von it's unsafe to drive ... and has been." I looked at the underside and it all made sense. I knew the transmission was not right when I bought it, but they wouldn't make it right. Looks like several thousand dollars ahead ... plus a rental car for about a week. As frustrating as it is, I'm glad it was discovered, and not on the road in Mexico. The agency is going to try and give me a break (Thankful to God.) Times like this we think of upgrading, but that's more $$$s I should be back in Mexico in a week. I'm glad they caught this ... be thankful in all things.

I'm frustrated! I've talked to, and listened to, several of my close friends and they think I should upgrade; as reliability is important at my age. Can't argue with that. Even if we had the money, getting a brand new SUV would fight the very culture I work in, as well as turn off many of my supporters. New is out. Maybe finding an older SUV with low and gentle mileage is the way to go.

"Lord wisdom wanted here."

I'm getting older with few years ahead, maybe I should just settle back into my old 2004 SUV ... and see who ultimately wins the race?

THE WRONG SIDE OF RIGHT

In my early Christian pilgrimage through many very conservative churches, I found myself on the wrong side of right. I was taught and/or caught; that "the more you didn't do the better Christian you were." Key words like testimony, worldly, liberal and modernist gave the Church elders a foundation of No-No's to build on, and like the Pharisees of old, the growing list was permanently fixed to the cross. As Church members we were into "not doing;" we were not to dance, party, play cards, gamble, smoke, drink, use "minced-oaths" …like darn, gosh, dog 'gone, etc. We were not to go to shows; mixed bathing (girls and boys in the same car going to the beach for the day.) was a No-No. Unfortunately I could keep going.

Actually what we didn't do was more important than what we did do. We were actually known for what we didn't do! "That's the Church that doesn't ..."

What we did do, was go to meetings and tithe. I caught on soon that the more meetings I attended during the week determined my spirituality. (Minimum: was three services a week.) Preaching was strong on Old Testament and the Epistles. Biblical it was, yet Biblical it wasn't.

Jesus and His testimony and teaching were very seldom heard from the pulpit ... I noted the book of James didn't have a place in the pulpit. For years I was stuck on the wrong side of right. Thank God, I broke free and found Churches that were Biblically balanced. I found the unheard-of Grace that was there all the time ... and heard the mandate "be doers of the Word."

Unfortunately, I find this also true the world I minister to in Tijuana; it seems that our early Christian missionaries exported that same kind of legalistic religion ... and I find so few that are willing to break out of it.

Remember Jesus greatest enemies were the legalistic ... the Pharisees! The Pharisees of today are no friend of His either.

A THIN STRIP OF MONEY

In our world of families where money is scarce, its hard for us in the U.S. to really understand the money factor ... just how many little things depend on money. As Americans we well understand that a big part of our living depends on money. However when you are very poor ... you actually think before buying a family tooth-brush or flashlight battery or for that matter a light-bulb.

Little things become big when you are poor. We Americans pretty we know there is a need for food. However, expensive Schooling surprises us. Schooling in Tijuana includes transportation, uniforms, shoes, books and projects. Understandably everyday food and schooling form their priorities and take their wages.

That leaves no money for medical emergencies! All emergencies start out with a cost for transportation, and end with a costly prescription. Transportation by bus or cab is expensive! Unfortunately they wait until the last minute to move!

Consequently, a good part of the money you send us is spent on medical emergencies. For instance if your child has asthma or bronchitis, taking him to an emergency clinic or hospital to get a nebulizer treatment; (the transportation $1.70) the treatment runs about $50. (A weeks wage.) In the long run its cheaper to buy a nebulizer and medication.

One of our mothers had to rush her child to the hospital using public transportation (bus and cab) ... and her little boy was vomiting blood! She had to beg some transportation money to get home to her other kids.

I remember one day, taking a mother and her several month old baby to the hospital ... in route the baby died! Dehydrated too long!

These are the people in our backyard, so close yet so far away. Where are our rich churches?

GRATITUDE

It's so easy to take blessings for granted; often we forget that blessings come in different sizes and shapes; often at odd times. Gratitude isn't just a word it's an attitude ... a feeling. A good and healthy feeling.

Because our ministry is that of giving, on most occasions we receive a gracious response. Hundreds of people, large and small, show their appreciation for our help. On most occasions it's a smile and gracias, and that's sufficient. The people, even little people show their gratitude.

More than once I caught a "bug" working in Mexico. Now that I'm older these "bugs" are easier to get and harder to shake. My latest was a chest cough; when I start coughing it sounded bad and looked worse. At an orphanage one night I had a coughing attack. Suddenly the kids got a chair, pulled me towards it, and sat me on it, other kids were patting me on the back. Eight pairs of eyes intently looking at my face ... a sudden response, a loving response, from kids who love me. Gratitude in a different form. I can still feel those little pats on my back.

On other occasions, I might add, many occasions, we know we hit the Divine moment of need when we slip a little financial help in the hands of a lady and suddenly there is an emotional breakdown ... a river of tears and a tight hug! Gracias! Gracias!! And the story flows out of how the unknown need was met by our gift. In most cases Hortensia is the one who gets the tears and hugs.

But she's not alone.

I remember late one afternoon driving back from a visit to Ijido, a rather isolated community ... a cold and muddy barrio of poor people living in shacks. As I was driving home, I saw Jose up the road, slowly riding toward me on his muddy bike. I pulled over to say "Hi," and in our short conversation I felt led to slip him a ten dollar bill ... he held it. Looked at it, and looked up at me ... then the tears started flowing and the story followed. He hadn't gotten paid and there was no food in his house. Gracias! Gracias!! Hermano von! Another Divine moment. One in many, many other moments.

These are moments I can't capture by film. I don't take pictures of sacred moments like this. Filming true gratitude is sort of tricky and can look canned.

Forgive me for not taking more time to let you all know how appreciative the poor are for your financial help.

Translated: Kids medical emergencies and prescriptions, transportation to hospital, the times of no-food or no drinking water, no school shoes or books, leaking roofs, etc.

Thank you so much.

LIFE AIN'T FAIR!

He's about seventeen now. Ugly. Terribly burned and crippled. This is Internet, so I won't use his name or photo (I have in the past).

When he was a little tot sitting in the car his father was working on, his father carelessly threw a lighted cigarette in the front seat where there was an open can of gas ... the gas ignited and spilled over the seat and over the little boy.

Badly burned, he was flown by helicopter to Shriners Hospital in the U.S in critical condition. Almost died. Years of painful medical visits to the U.S have helped Improve his physical condition.

Thank-you Shriners!

He contacted Hortensia yesterday. Wanted to talk. It seems his father was beating and kicking his mother (He often does this). and the boy could take it no longer, he hit his father ... at school he had to become a pretty good fighter as he was always ridiculed. The fight ended with His father forcing him out of the house ... "your useless, ugly and just another mouth to feed ... Leave!"

He's staying with his grandmother in her small house. That isn't working out. He wants a job, a place to stay.

Can you imagine the life this kid's lived? Think you have it bad? The other siblings have to watch their mother get beaten regularly.

"Hortensia I can work. I can sweep the floor and clean things ... I've cleaned bathrooms before, I'm willing to work!"
Hortensia gave him a few dollars and said "Come Wednesday morning and see Pastor von ... we'll see what we can do" ... Try and sleep with that on your mind.

Too often issues like this come up. Each one unique. Each one takes the wisdom of Solomon ... and often his pocket book. Now what would Jesus do? What should a Christian do? What can von do?

A SECOND LOOK AT REALITY

A cute little baby that just needs some milk and pampers. A second look; the larger picture brings a chilling reality. An uncomfortable question? Reality. Do we want to be committed to helping the future of this child, this family? We look again at this little baby and then we look in the eyes of his mother. We dare not think of the future.

We just can't just say God bless you and back out the door ... after all, "what would Jesus do?"

It was just to be a visit; a little milk and some pampers. For us a little visit often proves to be a dangerous venture; a costly venture.

Indeed our ministry always starts as a visit which can develop into hundreds of man hours and dollars.

A few years later we see Pepe sitting next to his little Christmas tree.  Today he's almost a teenager. Pepe now lives in a remote area of South Mexico. No Christmas tree or gifts this year. Knowing the family, alcohol would destroy any gifts we sent his way. We have contact with him by phone ... he longs to be back in Tijuana.

Our ministry is unique indeed. We open the door and go inside never knowing what situation we will find ourselves in.  Several days ago we opened the door and walked inside the cold little house. Mom and eight kids, (no man) absolutely no food in the house. No propane to cook with. She offered us a glass of cool-ade.  Thanks to you we got them food and propane ... that's what we do with your gifts.  Yes, we plan to give them, and several very poor neighbors, a special Christmas.

We wish you and yours a very nice Christmas and a happy healthy New Year.

In His love, Pastor Von and crew...

CHRISTMAS 2014

ON TWO SPECIAL DAYS IN THE YEAR WE LOOK UP. On these two days, when we sincerely say "Thank You, God," for your blessings, and for your awesome gifts. These two days form a colorful season, where we are a little more generous, and a little more kindly to those around us. We may not be jolly but we do seem to be nicer to each other. We smile more. Others are allowed into the picture.

I'm single so I spend those days in Mexico with "my people" ... hundred's of families with hundreds of children, add four orphanages and Santa von has quite a challenge in bringing even a little of the Thankful spirit, and the Christmas spirit across the border. The challenge again becomes "how".

So few of us this year; Lucas, Hortensia, von and one car to share with so many; four big barrios and four orphanages. The kids, who normally don't even think a day ahead, are starting to ask about Christmas.

THIS WILL BE MY FIRST CHRISTMAS APART FROM SPECTRUM MINISTRIES. Now what can I do and how can I do it? Three or four people. One car. Lacking the funding Spectrum had ... Time for some creative thinking ... I'll be keeping you up-to-date with two newsletters.

This is blanket time! This is lona time (sheets of plastic to cover roofs). This is toy time ... and it's always food time.

Out of curiosity I asked a few kids last week, what would you rather have, toys and gifts or dollars ... the answer came back fast! Dollars! How crass! How un-Christmas. How hungry! I was surprised. I'll ask more kids and hear what they have to say. Lets realize these kids are very poor ... and hungry.

IF ANY OF YOU WOULD LIKE TO HELP ME OUT BY PRAYER AND FINANCE IT WOULD REALLY BE APPRECIATED. Remember in Mexico their Holiday Season extends until two weeks into January.

Each of you receiving this letter has contributed to us before, may I again thank you for the generous gifts you sent us. I, along with my little crew, want to wish you a happy.

One night around Christmas we took this family their first Christmas tree! It sparkled with lights and a few colorful little globes. I caught this picture just right ... this little girl was mesmerized by the sight, I think she was doing a little dreaming too ... she just kept staring into the tree.

The Christmas Season in the world of very poor is unlike any thing you have ever seen or felt. In some areas it's existence as usual. In the world of the dump, the trash, seagulls and workers will be combing through the garbage. While in the barrios the Christmas spirit will be exchanged for bottles of beer and tequila. The kids will be out of school and many will be running around without jackets trying to sell stuff.

We want to bring a small bit of Christmas joy into the lives of these hundreds of kids. When your poor it doesn't take much to bring a smile.

In our areas, as the kids see it, we represent their only hope.

Team up with us as we try and bring a little joy along the south side of our border. We'll be happy to represent you to the kids next door.

Hortensia, Lucas and I want to wish you a very happy Thanksgiving and Christmas time!

God Bless you and may you an yours be blessed this New Year.

P.S. If you would like to help me out this Christmas, simply write a check to DEANZA COMMUNITY CHURCH, and mail it to 1043 EMMA DRIVE, CARDIFF, CA 92007.

Your help really be greatly appreciated.

THE COUNTDOWN BEGINS

Two special days in the year, we look up. The two days when we sincerely say "Thank you God" for your blessings and for your awesome gift. The two days together form a colorful Season where we are a little more generous and kindly to those around us. We may not be jolly but we do seem to be nicer to each other. We smile more. Others are allowed into the picture.

I'm single so I spend those days in Mexico with "my people" ... hundred's of families with hundreds of children, add four orphanages and Santa von has quite a challenge in bringing even a little of the Thankful spirit, and the Christmas spirit across the border. The challenge again becomes "how".

So few of us this year; Lucas, Hortensia, von and one car to share with so many; four big barrios and four orphanages. The kids, who normally don't even think a day ahead, are starting to ask about Christmas.

This will be my first Christmas apart from Spectrum. Now what can I do and how can I do it? Three or four people. One car. Lacking the funding Spectrum had ... Time for some creative thinking. (I'll keep you in touch with two letters.)

This is blanket time! This is lona time (sheets of plastic to cover roofs.) This is toy time and it's always food time.

Out of curiosity I asked a few kids last week, what would you rather have, toys and gifts or dollars ... the answer came back fast! Dollars! How crass! How hungry. I was surprised. I'll ask more kids and hear what they have to say. Lets realize these kids are very poor ... and hungry.

If any of you would like to help me out this Christmas Season by prayer and finance it would really be appreciated. Remember in Mexico their Holiday Season lasts until two weeks into January. Got any takers?

A COMMUNITY OF THE WORTHLESS

Caution this Blog may contain uncomfortable reading!

Yesterday I visited Chuy's old folks home in Tijuana. Another strata of worthless people no one wants to invest in. Who in his right mind would invest in the aged? A community of more than 140 old and worthless people simply awaiting their turn to die. These are old and sick people; problem people even other Old Folks Homes rejected! One by one Chuy takes them in. Each one has their story. Unfortunately, for many, there is no light at the end of their tunnel.

Being 85 myself gives me, may I say, a weird and uncomfortable feeling interacting with these people that are awaiting the end. A gentle reminder that my time is getting short too and that I need to do what I can while I can.

Along with the poor barrios and orphanages we've been quietly supporting this community too. Not many do.

I feel the Lord considers these people worthy of investing. I don't just feel it I know it.

The old folks home which Pastor Chuy started many years ago keeps growing although the monthly death rate is high. The home is run by a few volunteers, no Government help (Not unusual) He just trusts God. It's clean and neat; unfortunately he needs more rooms. He would like to buy the property next door to put a Church up. You have to hand it to the man, he's got vision; as with most of us, his vision is slightly ahead of his funding.

I'm really impressed with some of the invisible ministries in Tijuana. Many are Christian (but where is the church??) Volunteers work simply for room and board. The environments are ugly, smelly and full of pain. Again, no Government help.

Many won't be comfortable with a Blog like this but, really ... how long can Christians turn their eyes and pocketbook away from the needy?

MY WORD ON FERAL TEENS

Last night I went where I shouldn't have gone. I went to YouTube ... Subject: "Street Kids" ... I should know better. I've worked with street-kids for a half a century, plenty of them, right here in Tijuana. I've watched them in other countries as well. Why look at more?

I looked at street kids in India. Street kids in Brazil. Street kids in the Philippines and Mexico City. These worthless little parasites are everywhere. Millions of them in this world. They are like leeches or fleas gaining their life from sick urban societies. Born to exist but never to live.

Cops hate them because they are little thieves causing trouble wherever they nest.

Most of these kids have run from a "home" of sorts, tired of the constant confusion, fighting and abuse inside their shelter, they run, sometimes toddle to the hell awaiting them in the streets, where they find their own kind and integrate ... worthless dirty little two legged rodent's invading the streets of big cities.

Two Street Kids Huffing Paint Spray

Later, Stoned, They Support Each Other

One by one the kids realize they are worthless and unwanted. Being unloved mixes them into a different human chemistry, indeed social misfits. In many cases angry against society.

I remember visiting a city in Brazil and where I was staying; word came of a mass grave that was discovered near us. The bodies of eleven kids, with their arms wired together were laying in their grave, each kid had been shot in back of the head. Professional exterminators. Problem solved.

In that city there is an understanding of how to deal with problem kids that hang in your neighborhood. Call a private phone number ... negotiate a cash deal. Late at night a black van with a few off duty police cruses the neighborhood and quietly collect and dispose of the "problem" kids.

It grabs you.

Looking at little kids sucking on plastic bags with some rubber cement inside ... or a couple of sprays from a can of spray paint. Crystal clear eyes that once looked directly at you, now take on a glassy stare, eyelids slowly drop as they enter a peaceful, restful world. I've seen it and it hurts. A four year old or five year old "huffing", hurts bad!

Why do I look at even more of what I've already seen? It builds frustration and anger in me that combine to develop more energy that drives me on, to do more. Why? Because God loves them.

God knows I can't do it all, but I'm going to go down trying! Doing what I can, while I can.

When You Crash Anything Becomes a Pillow

PUBLIC PRAYER

A very wise man once said "there is a time for everything" and with permission I'll include public prayer. (Ecclesiastes 3:1-8) I was going to end my comments with that; but why not start my short essay with that knowledge. (1) public prayer with Christians. (2) Public prayer, as in front of non-believers.

I've lived in this world for 85 years, and lived in the Church and "Christian" world for almost 75 of those years. That's a long time! As far as "Christian" public prayers go I can honestly say I have heard many thousands of prayers. We used to have Prayer Meetings each week, so that doubled my exposure to Christians praying, or in a few cases "braying".

1. Praying before the Believers: Too often the prayers I heard were shallow; simply announcements or news bulletins in a prayer form, most prayers were long and exhaustive. "Lord we know Saturday's prayer breakfast starts at eight, help everyone get there on time!" Some were even prayer covered criticism of others or maybe a worldly activity. "God bless Thelma, you know she's too fat, but help her to lose weight!" ... "Another bad movie is coming next week, Lord burn the movie-house down! Or prayer for critical issues like ... "Father bless my cousin Roger and his dear family as they head to Hawaii on a cruse next week." "Oh Lord convict my wife for her critical tongue!" On and on I could go. I guess these brothers and sisters were searching wildly for something to pray about. Or in a few cases bray about. Wow! When the person next to you finishes praying, super pressure, you're on next!! (Not criticizing, just telling the truth!) Many Churches are dropping their Prayer Meetings. Why? Well, to be honest, they have nothing to pray about. Why shouldn't I question public prayer in Church? At my age I have the right to do some truthful questioning. I certainly won't knock Church prayer meetings, after all it was a Spirit filled Prayer Meeting that gave birth to The Church! ... it's just immature individuals and leaders acting out their immaturity in a public prayer format. Give them time.
2. Praying before the unsaved ... or the "world!" The first thing I ask is; what's the motive? What's the point? Think it over. To give a Christian witness? Is God really calling you to do that? Why do publicly what you could do at home ... powerful honest prayer. Oh, I see! Corporate, witness. Making a together a more powerful show. We are Christians ... look you can see us, and we're praying together ... for all of you damn sinners! I've even heard of a parade of Christians showing their Christianity by parading down the street. Doing a parade for God! Wow! How sick; although its much easier to do that than live the Christian life 24/7 The honest question to ask is simple what do the people watching you think? Isn't that the point? That's the bottom line.

If we are trying to reach them? Why alienate them?

Stupid if you ask me. If we were in a Muslim culture, (Indonesia) we would be fools to pray as a group publicly! We would be culturally wrong. Sincere leaders, eager but immature, who don't know their culture, on occasion alienate the very people they want to win. Unfortunately ... so it will be.

Public prayer before non-believers? Think it over.

Uncomfortable fact! The people you want to reach need to see the Believers lifestyle as different ... Godly. They need to see and feel, the fruit of the Spirit (Gal.5:22) If we as Christians HAVE The Spirit, this shouldn't be hard ... if we haven't the Spirit, (fact) public prayer is not a good substitute, it's only going to confuse and alienate. In my opinion, public prayer is no substitute for a Christ like lifestyle.

But I must defer ... and as I said, a very wise man once said "there is a time for everything." With permission I'll include public prayer.

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens:

• a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot,
• a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build,
• a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance,
• a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
• a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away,
• a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak,
• a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace.

~ Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

SHAME ON ME!

Many, many years ago, I was speaking to my youth group of about forty teens, and I was talking on courage! I was really pumped! The true Christian has to have backbone! A Christian has to have courage! In conclusion I decided to ask the group to act. "I want to see if any of you have courage; if you are a Christian and not ashamed of it, stand up!" Well, most stood up, except for three boys who remained seated. At that moment I became painfully aware of what I just did!



I did wrong! I was sincere but stupid! I was shaming!

I put the three kids on the spot! I shamed them! I alienated those I wanted to win. On the other side I created and reinforced liars and hypocrites who broke under the public shame pressure and stood with the rest of the group when they really should have remained seated.

I dismissed the meeting and went directly to the three honest kids and apologized. More than that I commended them for their honesty and courage. In fact they had more courage than many of the hypocrites who stood up. (The three became my friends.) I like honest people.

When I look back; public "shaming" was just one of our tools. I had never thought of it that way before. Asking the group to make a public act which will divide the group. To stand or raise your hand. Shaming is so wrong ... cruel and crippling.

Example: telling your group: "Those who will promise to read a chapter of your Bible each day this week, raise your hand!" What does this shaming do? It divides. It creates liars and hypocrites. It may get a few to read, Is shaming a few of them into it really worth it?

Throw shaming out of your tool box, it's simply wrong!

Any time you as a leader ask your group to raise your hands if ... or stand to your feed if ... consider closely what your doing!

As a new Christian when asked to pray aloud I would sweat drops of blood! What do you say in a prayer. I stumbled my prayer to the group, not to God ... and dreaded prayer public prayer since. The shame of not knowing how to pray.

Oh boy, ask your kids to read aloud certain scriptures, then you come to an uncomfortable kid who really can't read well ... shame floods him!

I learned my lesson, I don't shame people anymore.

Several years ago, I was asked to take my turn leading in the opening prayer for a Billy Graham Crusade. As the day drew near, I was sweating! I have no problem praying alone in my room, but praying before 35,000 people? Yeah, I carefully wrote my prayer and said my prayer, but was that a prayer to God? No! It was simply a public utterance on Graham's platform.

I hate to be put on the spot, and so do you ... why put others on the spot?

GET THE KIDS OUT

It probably went something like this ... "Ladies, ladies! listen! The Teacher hasn't time to bless all of your children. Today He has a lot of teaching to do! Please leave the front here and take your kids with you, they're only a distraction!" WRONG MOVE! "Peter, Andrew, listen ... let the children come to me, for of such is the Kingdom of God. You must become as a child even to enter my Kingdom." Jesus knew something the disciples along with many of us, have forgotten. Children are natural believers! (Mark 10:13-15)

I'll admit I wasn't born a Christian, but I was born a believer. We were all born believers. It's a shame life changes us. We believed, we trusted ... we learned!

O. K. I'll admit I believed in Santa Claus and his slay with reindeer pulling it through the sky. By any measure an aerodynamic challenge, but Christmas Eve I listened. I hoped. I trusted. I was disappointed. I was fooled!

At an early age I heard that at the end of a rainbow there was a pot of gold! Now in Southern California it didn't rain often but on occasion I would see a rainbow and I was off hunting for the pot of gold. Yep I was a believer. I trusted. I returned to my house a simple and poor, wet fool!

As I grew older, little by little my innocent belief was corroded, as was my trust. Who was I to trust? Who was I to believe? What was I to believe and what was I to trust? Caution hit my belief.

My belief and my trust became guarded and rightfully so.

I was a simple and innocent believer no longer. Through my disappointment I learned not to believe everyone and everything.

I was asked to believe in God; a God whom I had never seen. Jesus was invisible too. The Bible was just a dead book. I was asked to believe I was a sinner and that I needed saving. I was told Jesus paid the price for my sins. I was asked to trust in the Lord. Trust in His Word. Believe in this? Trust this word? My struggle was legitimate! I wrestled with this.

This was simply too much for my fragile human belief ... thank you Holy Spirit for helping me through my wall of cynicism to become a true, trusting BELIEVER.

Only God could make me a believer again, and He did.

Now, being born again of the Spirit, I start once more as a simple trusting believer. Please God, let no professing believer cause me to stumble and fall.

"Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. Truly I tell you, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it."

~ Mark 10:13-15

30 MINUTES AFTER WE LEFT

 Jonathon

It was sudden, it was tragic and deadly as vehicle accidents tend to be. Because this truck was very heavy, full of water, as it crashed it smashed everything! The driver and owner of the truck was killed leaving his wife and three little kids. Another widow.

Jonathon, 15, had a job on the truck helping deliver water to poor communities including Ijido. He didn't earn much but what he did earn he gave the family to help with food and schooling. The family is nine. Their father left the family two years ago. He had lung cancer and became too weak to hold down a job. He told his oldest son "I'm too weak to work, I'm worthless, just another mouth to feed, I'm leaving in a couple of days." He left and has never returned.

Family life has changed radically since the accident. They all live one way or another at the hospital. Families tend to stay at the hospital day and night waiting. Always waiting. (What a place to minister.)

 Getting Update on Jonathon

Yesterday while I was there, Jonathon's mother, Aracele, returned from talking with the doctor. In the accident, Jonathon's head was crushed, arm broken several abdominal punctures. At this point they have put him in an induced coma until Monday. The news wasn't good, she calmly shared it with the family.

 Jose Angel

To make matters worse, when Jonathon's two older brothers heard about the accident, they asked their supervisor for permission to leave work and head to the hospital to see their brother. In fact they asked him for a little transportation money. He flatly refused, and told them to get back to work! The boys threw down their shovels and left ... the supervisor yelling "... and don't come back!" Looks like support for the family is at flat zero.

That's where you enable us to come in immediately and help. They will need lots of help for a time. Not only Jonathon's family but the new widow and her three children in Ijido.

As I left everyone was eating, Hortensia bought barbequed chicken, tortillas and cold drinks for the family, and dolls for each of the little girls.

 Kids in a Cold House